5 Dehumanizing Myths About Fat Guys and Dating That We Can’t Excuse

A game show where two families compete for a cash prize by trying to find the most popular answers to a variety of questions about a month ago, one of my sisters tagged me in a video she recorded of Family Feud. In the episode she recorded, host and comedian Steve Harvey asks the participants to resolve an extremely loaded statement: “Name reasons a lady might opt to be with a chubby or fat man.”

The contestants’ answers end up supplying a round that is humorous the minds associated with the participants, Steve Harvey, and presumably the viewers.

But my sister did share that is n’t video clip on the Facebook page to garner laughs from her family and friends. It had been quite contrary: my sibling ended up being upset at the round’s subject therefore the responses provided. My sis penned:

“This actually bothers me! This is the reason individuals think you need to be skinny/fit to be gorgeous, to be desired, to be loved, and also to deserve anything…this is never OK!”

My sister tagged me personally on this page knowing my back ground in fat studies and sexuality studies (and also as a fat masculine person), once you understand i might agree along with her frustrations.

Image description: A screenshot for the Family Feud game board aided by the six most widely used responses: “Fatty got cash” (34 away from 100 individuals surveyed), “She’s fat/digs food” (23/100), “She’ll look better” (12/100), “She’s in love” (9/100), “He’s warm/cuddly” (6/100), and “He won’t cheat” (4/100). The thing this round that is particular of Feud does correctly is summarize a number of the unfortunate fables our society perpetuates about fat individuals — specifically, fat males — and relationships.

But, calling away myths that are fatphobic clearly maybe not the game’s aim. Rather it perpetuated body terrorism against fat figures to get cheap laughs. Let’s proceed through each one of the top six many answers that are popular order to better understand how they’re inaccurate and bad for guys of size.

1. “Fatty Got Money!”: Fat Men Are Only Valuable With Their Cash or Power

The misconception: the fact this misconception is one of popular of this six provided responses — 34 of this 100 people initially surveyed provided this or a similarly-worded solution — is troubling by itself. This misconception is one thing we come across throughout US tradition, whether or not it’s in films, politics, or culture that is popular.

The general assumption is that this fat man has to have money or some sort of power if a classically attractive person of any gender is with a fat man. Why else would an individual who could presumably get with anybody they desired decide to get with a disgusting man that is fat right?

This sort of idea is incredibly damaging for a lot of fat guys, placing each of their value as individuals in to the cash or energy they might or might not have.

More reads that are radical going from Healthism to Radical Self-Love: the guy within the picture

The reality: While you will find, needless to say, many people whom just look for relationships for cash or energy, the reality is that quite often, individuals will decide to get with a man that is fat they really wish to be with him. This myth beautifulpeople hookup is significantly less usually put on skinny or “fit” guys, unless of program see your face is well known to own cash or energy. Nonetheless it’s much easier for folks to comprehend two thin or traditionally appealing individuals being together because they’re interested in one another than when a skinny or usually appealing individual chooses become with a fat guy for any other less trivial reasons.

2. “She’s Fat/Digs Food”: Fat People Just Like Other Fat Individuals

The misconception: with this particular misconception, we come across just how people try to just take away fat people’s agency. It suggests that fat individuals will simply be in a position to have relationships along with other fat individuals, whether it’s because they just find other fat individuals attractive or that is all they are able to “get”, when you look at the many brutal of terms.

Slipped into this misconception is an associated myth that is fatphobic that all fat individuals love to consume lots of meals, and all sorts of individuals who want to consume food are fat.

The reality: place clearly, the presumption that fat individuals will just look for relationships along with other fat people is false. Humans — fat, thin, plus in between — may be and sometimes are drawn to a variety that is wide of of all sizes and shapes. To assume that fat individuals will just ever be with fat individuals reaches the very least ignorant, if you don’t totally fatphobic and sizeist.

So when for the proven fact that fatness is inherently correlated with (over)eating — that’s another misconception too.

3. “She’ll Look Better”: Fat Guys Are Ugly

The misconception: all men that are fat in accordance with this worldview, are inherently less appealing than just about any partner they are able to ever have. Such men’s partners would only utilize them to look more appealing in comparison. This misconception helps make the assumption that, as previously mentioned above, no body could conceivably maintain a relationship with a man that is fat they’re actually attracted to him. Fat individuals are simply tools to presumably make their non-fat) partners feel more desirable.

The facts: just like some individuals might pursue a man that is fat cash or energy, some individuals might just pursue fat males to look more appealing to other people. In fact, though, this appears to be less frequent than this solution could have us think.

I’ll keep saying the purpose, even in the event We appear to be a broken record: lots of people really find fat guys appealing!

4. “She’s In Love”